Grief is a tricky thing. Sometimes it can quietly creep up on you, with just whispers of sadness. Other times it can completely consume you. And not matter what you do or how much others try to cheer you up, the pain just hurts. So much.
There are a couple of times of the year when this grief wallops me. The end of April and the middle of October. I usually try to keep this darkness to myself because things still need to get done. Obligations still have to be met. Family still needs to be taken care of. Dinner still needs to get on the table.
I keep going.
Because there is no other choice.